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30/05/2008, 9:37 PM WeAreYellows49 Joined on 11/12/2007 Dereham Posts 4,414 Re: It's Joke Time A lady golfer is stung by a wasp. She goes to look for the greenkeeper and finds him. "I've been stung by a wasp" She says. " Where did it get you?" He replies "Between the 1st and 2nd hole" "I think your stance must be a little too wide" Formerly - MightyYellows God how I wish I were a tomato in the sun and warmth, instead of being a mushroom, kept in the dark and fed.... ....    Report

31/05/2008, 7:27 PM sam Joined on 05/09/2007 Posts 607 Re: It's Joke Time Here is a similar one to that one; I was playing golf the other day and i hit the very first tee shot, it went really well actually but i hit a woman walking across the fairway. So i went to the clubhouse and i said "Is there a doctor about?" Luckily this bloke in there was a doctor, he said "Whats' happened?" I said "I've hit a woman" He said "Whereabouts have you hit her?" I said "It's between the first and the second hole" He said "You've not left much room for a bandage"   LEEDS ARE GOING UP BECKFORD IS A LEGEND    Report

02/06/2008, 9:40 PM WeAreYellows49 Joined on 11/12/2007 Dereham Posts 4,414 Re: It's Joke Time After a wonderful night of love making, the young guy rolled over and was looking around when he noticed a framed picture of another man on a desk in the distance. Naturally, the guy began to worry. "Is that your husband?" he inquired nervously. "No, silly," she replied, snuggling up to him. "Your boyfriend then?" he asked. "No, not at all," she said, nibbling away at his ear. "Well, who is he then?" demanded the bewildered guy. Calmly, she answered, "That's me before the surgery."   lol Formerly - MightyYellows God how I wish I were a tomato in the sun and warmth, instead of being a mushroom, kept in the dark and fed.... ....    Report

03/06/2008, 2:48 PM jay kay Joined on 28/07/2007 Posts 1,866 Re: It's Joke Time dyslexic man walks into a bra..... love you mum. R.I.P    Report

04/06/2008, 10:37 AM WeAreYellows49 Joined on 11/12/2007 Dereham Posts 4,414 Re: It's Joke Time What do you get when you cross a rooster and a telephone pole?  A 40ft cock that wants to reach out and touch someone. Formerly - MightyYellows God how I wish I were a tomato in the sun and warmth, instead of being a mushroom, kept in the dark and fed.... ....    Report

05/06/2008, 1:59 PM WeAreYellows49 Joined on 11/12/2007 Dereham Posts 4,414 Re: It's Joke Time With all the recent talk of cloning, you'd think it was a new thing. But in fact, a very wealthy westerner had himself cloned many years ago. The boy grew up to have very foul mouth. The more the son swore, the madder the father got. One day, the father got so mad he pushed his son off a high cliff. The sheriff arrested him for making an obscene clone fall Formerly - MightyYellows God how I wish I were a tomato in the sun and warmth, instead of being a mushroom, kept in the dark and fed.... ....    Report

10/06/2008, 7:49 PM WeAreYellows49 Joined on 11/12/2007 Dereham Posts 4,414 Re: It's Joke Time Three guys are in a Cessna. The first drops a penny out the window. The second drops a pencil and the third a bomb. When the plane lands, the first guy goes to see where the penny landed. He sees a guy swearing and trying to get a penny out of his forehead. The second sees a girl holding her dog who has a pencil through his head. The third guy sees a guy laughing his head off. He asks, "Why are you laughing?" The guy says, "I was cooking on my BBQ when I farted..." "What's so funny about that?" "It blew my neighbor's house apart!" Formerly - MightyYellows God how I wish I were a tomato in the sun and warmth, instead of being a mushroom, kept in the dark and fed.... ....    Report

13/06/2008, 9:31 PM Son Ova Gunn Joined on 03/08/2007 Posts 41 Re: It's Joke Time many years ago a young boy named wiz walked into the kitchen and said to his dad  'daddy, did you know granny has a prawn?' '' im sorry wiz, you must be mistaken' said the dad. The little boy protested, 'she has she has' so the dad said ok son show me little wiz walked his dad to the bedroom where ganny slept, pulled back the covers and pointed, 'look dad see i told you!' 'No dear boy, thats your ganny's clitoris wiz' crestfallen little wiz lowers his head and says ' well it tasted like a prawn'       *tumble weed blows by and large black hole swallows son ova gunn*      Report

25/06/2008, 2:50 PM WeAreYellows49 Joined on 11/12/2007 Dereham Posts 4,414 Re: It's Joke Time Do you know what a Yankee is? Same as a quickie, except you're by yourself  Formerly - MightyYellows God how I wish I were a tomato in the sun and warmth, instead of being a mushroom, kept in the dark and fed.... ....    Report

25/06/2008, 5:36 PM Delia's Well Behaved Devonshire Dirtbox Joined on 26/10/2004 Tiverton Posts 1,888 Re: It's Joke Time Man goes to a prostitute cos he aint got lucky in a while Starts to get jiggy with her and within a minute has his face in her muff giving it a good licking all of a sudden he get a bit of potato in his mouth, thinks nothing of it and wipes it away minute later and he's got a pee in his mouth, spits it out and carries on with excitement couple of minutes pass and a bit of carrot appears "Right what the f**k is  going on, why have you got bits of vegtables coming out of your pussy? are you sick or something?" "no" she replies, "but the last bloke was"    Report

07/07/2008, 8:50 PM WeAreYellows49 Joined on 11/12/2007 Dereham Posts 4,414 Re: It's Joke Time A boy tells his dad that his school homework is to find out the difference of 'potentially' and 'realistically'. "Ask your mum if she would sleep with the milkman for 1 million pounds," says the boys dad. The boy runs off. 5 minutes later, he runs back saying, "mum said yes." "Now go and ask your sister," advises his dad. Again the boy runs off and when he returns he again announces, "she said yes." "So potentially we're sitting on 2 million quid," replies his old man, "but realistically, we're living with a pair of slappers." Formerly - MightyYellows God how I wish I were a tomato in the sun and warmth, instead of being a mushroom, kept in the dark and fed.... ....    Report

12/07/2008, 8:29 PM WeAreYellows49 Joined on 11/12/2007 Dereham Posts 4,414 Re: It's Joke Time The dictionary by gender................ THINGY (thing-ee) n. female: Any part under a car's bonnet. male: The strap fastener on a woman's bra. LESBIAN (lez-bee-an) n. female: A woman who makes love to another woman. male: A woman who has sex with other women so men can watch. VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj. female: Fully opening up one's self emotionally to another. male: Playing cricket without a box. REMOTE CONTROL (ri-moht kon-trohl) n. female: A device for changing from one TV channel to another. male: A device for scanning through all 75 channels every 2 minutes. COMMUNICATION (ko-muu-ni-kay-shon) n. female: The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one's partner. male: Scratching out a note before suddenly taking off for a weekend with the lads. BUM (bum) n. female: The body part that every item of clothing manufactured makes look bigger. male: The organ for mooning (and farting). COMMITMENT (ko-mit-ment) n. female: A desire to get married and raise a family. male: Not trying to pick up other women while out with one's girlfriend. ENTERTAINMENT (en-ter-tayn-ment) n. female: A good movie, concert, play or book. male: Sex FLATULENCE (flach-u-lens) n. female: An embarrassing by-product of digestion. male: An endless source of entertainment, self-expression and male bonding. MAKING LOVE (may-king luv) n. female: The greatest expression of intimacy a couple can achieve. male: What women do while the man is shagging. Formerly - MightyYellows God how I wish I were a tomato in the sun and warmth, instead of being a mushroom, kept in the dark and fed.... ....    Report

13/07/2008, 7:48 PM WeAreYellows49 Joined on 11/12/2007 Dereham Posts 4,414 Re: It's Joke Time I've just been down my garden and was shocked to see my dog shagging a cabbage; silly little bugger must've thought it was a collie Formerly - MightyYellows God how I wish I were a tomato in the sun and warmth, instead of being a mushroom, kept in the dark and fed.... ....    Report

13/08/2008, 9:30 PM WeAreYellows49 Joined on 11/12/2007 Dereham Posts 4,414 Re: It's Joke Time A young flat chested lady goes to Dr Smith about getting her breasts enlarged. 'After you have your morning shower, rub your breasts and say scoobie doobie doobie, I want bigger boobies' he says After several months of constantly doing this ritual, she has grown a cracking pair of D Cups. However, whilst on the bus into to town she suddenly realises she forgot her routine. Despite being in the gaze of the public, she bravely stands up, closes her eyes and says 'scoobie doobie doobie, I want bigger boobies' As she sits back down, a young chap says, 'your a patient of Dr Smith, aren't you?'. 'Yes, how did you know???' she replies. The man moves closer, winks and says, 'hickory dickory dock...... Formerly - MightyYellows God how I wish I were a tomato in the sun and warmth, instead of being a mushroom, kept in the dark and fed.... ....    Report

14/08/2008, 6:34 PM WeAreYellows49 Joined on 11/12/2007 Dereham Posts 4,414 Re: It's Joke Time 2 Blokes (Japanese and American) are playing golf. The Japanese guy is getting ready to tee off and suddenly starts talking to his thumb. American bloke says: "What you doin?" "Oh, don't worry, with Microtechnology I have a Microphone in my thumb. I was just recording a message." The 2 men carry on golfing, but all of a sudden the American man makes a funny sound, that amazingly sounds like a fart. The Japanese man looks over at him. 'Oh,' says the American. "Don't worry, I'm just receiving a fax." Formerly - MightyYellows God how I wish I were a tomato in the sun and warmth, instead of being a mushroom, kept in the dark and fed.... ....    Report

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pink'un » Have Your Say » It's not just f... » Re: It's Joke Time

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