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18/12/2007, 1:28 PM San Miguel Joined on 26/04/2006 Norwichio Posts 769 It's Joke Time Its been ages since we've had a joke thread so come on people - any Christmas jokes in particular? I've got a non-Christmas joke I heard last night: Little Mandy was kneeling ion her back lawn digging a hole in the ground Her neighbour seeing what she is doing, asks why she is digging a hole Mandy replies "i'm digging a hole to bury my goldfish who just died" "i'm sorry to hear that" says the neighbour "but isn't that an awfully big hole for a goldfish?" "yes" she says "that's because he's inside your cat!"    Report

18/12/2007, 2:44 PM jay kay Joined on 28/07/2007 Posts 1,716 Re: It's Joke Time you watched live at the apollo last night... love you mum R.I.P    Report

19/12/2007, 1:12 PM San Miguel Joined on 26/04/2006 Norwichio Posts 769 Re: It's Joke Time  buddhaboy wrote: you watched live at the apollo last night... i did, tho its not the same now they've taken out the swear word!    Report

22/12/2007, 8:25 PM sam Joined on 05/09/2007 Posts 596 Re: It's Joke Time One evening Alex Ferguson's phone rings. It's the fire brigade telling him that Old Traffod is on fire. "The cups!" shouts Ferguson. "Save the cups!" "Don't worry, sir," says the fireman. "The flames haven't got to the canteen yet." LEEDS ARE GOING UP BECKFORD IS A LEGEND    Report

22/12/2007, 11:48 PM jay kay Joined on 28/07/2007 Posts 1,716 Re: It's Joke Time omad djalili joke... 3 men in a dinghie, englishman, scotsman and an indian. a shark is heading 2wards them....knocks the dinghie and the englishman falls out and gets eaten... the shark comes round again, knocks the scotsman out. eats him... the shark comes round once more and and at the very last second begins to swim away... the indian looks up the the skys and shouts "thank you god for saving me, but why??" and the shark turns round and says " i had an indian last year and my arse is still burning!!!!" love you mum R.I.P    Report

24/12/2007, 8:10 PM sam Joined on 05/09/2007 Posts 596 Re: It's Joke Time i have been advised to start going to the gym but i said "no its just not for me, last time i went i went on the rowing machine and just drifted away"!! luchtime brigader, what do you think to that LEEDS ARE GOING UP BECKFORD IS A LEGEND    Report

24/12/2007, 8:12 PM sam Joined on 05/09/2007 Posts 596 Re: It's Joke Time i was at a friends funeral the other day as his grandad had just passed away, i said how did he die, he said he was in the chair, closed his eyes and never woke up again, the dentist had a fit!!   LEEDS ARE GOING UP BECKFORD IS A LEGEND    Report

24/12/2007, 8:43 PM PBTC Joined on 24/09/2007 Asda Posts 697 Re: It's Joke Time  sam wrote: luchtime brigader, what do you think to that Those last two were awful especially the dentist one, think you need to lay off that sherry! 4/10    Report

25/12/2007, 3:58 PM sam Joined on 05/09/2007 Posts 596 Re: It's Joke Time merry christmas lunchtime brigader, how about this one then. Did you know that you can now get funerals at tescos, it's brilliant, shop till you drop!!! i will lay off the sherry for now whilst i prepare some jokes just for you to laugh at. LEEDS ARE GOING UP BECKFORD IS A LEGEND    Report

25/12/2007, 5:05 PM PBTC Joined on 24/09/2007 Asda Posts 697 Re: It's Joke Time Merry Christmas to you Sam and all long suffering Norwich fans. The Tesco one is pretty poor again, not on your usual form I'm afraid. Got a couple of corkers in the old crackers today... What do snails use to polish themselves? Snail Varnish! Why did the skeleton not go to the New Years' party? He had no body to go with! I'm here all week.    Report

25/12/2007, 7:43 PM sam Joined on 05/09/2007 Posts 596 Re: It's Joke Time Im also here all week mate, heres one for you. This man gets pulled over by the police and as the policeman approaches him he sees the man beating up his dog, so the policeman says "what are you doing to that dog", the man says "well you'd do the same if it had your tax disk"!!!! Here's another one for you. Where does Tarzan buy all of his clothes? A jungle sale!!!! I'm here all week. LEEDS ARE GOING UP BECKFORD IS A LEGEND    Report

24/01/2008, 12:37 PM WeAreYellows49 Joined on 11/12/2007 Dereham Posts 3,520 Re: It's Joke Time A guy is lying in his hospital bed, wired up with drips and monitors, breathing with the aid of an oxygen mask. A young lady comes round the ward with the tea and newspaper trolley. Approaching him she asks if there is anything she can do for him. The guy looks at her and asks "Are my testicles black?" "I'm sorry but I'm not medical staff, I can't help you with that" she replies. "Oh, please have a look for me, I'm really worried; Are my testicles black?" Taking pity on his obvious distress the girl glances around the ward and, seeing there are no medical staff around, says "Alright, I'll have a look for you". She pulls back the bedcover, cupping his balls in her hand tells him, with a note of relief in her voice, "No, they look fine to me". The patient pulls off his oxygen mask and says "I said, Are my test results back?" Formerly - MightyYellows God how I wish I were a tomato in the sun and warmth, instead of being a mushroom, kept in the dark and fed.... ....    Report

24/01/2008, 2:46 PM we8wba Joined on 16/06/2007 Posts 3,371 Re: It's Joke Time a polar bear went into a bar and said to the barmen "can i have a gin .......... & tonic please?" barment replies "why the long pause?" polar bear replies "because im a polar bear"   do you get it? pause - paws   oh never mind    Report

24/01/2008, 2:56 PM WeAreYellows49 Joined on 11/12/2007 Dereham Posts 3,520 Re: It's Joke Time lol we8wba Formerly - MightyYellows God how I wish I were a tomato in the sun and warmth, instead of being a mushroom, kept in the dark and fed.... ....    Report

24/01/2008, 3:34 PM we8wba Joined on 16/06/2007 Posts 3,371 Re: It's Joke Time  WeAreYellows49 wrote: lol we8wba EASY EASY EASY LOL    Report

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